My Kids DON’T NEED a HOT mom

My kids DON'T NEED a HOT momThe recent HOT topic about the mom who posted a picture showing off her post-babies bod has been on my mind a lot these past few weeks. The changes my body is going through while being pregnant with my third child, to both my joy and dismay, have brought her story to my attention again. In this blog post, I want to share some thoughts that have been stewing in my mind since first seeing and hearing about Maria Kang’s story. I’m not her, so I have no idea what truly drove her to post the picture in the above link – but I do know how her post affected me and to be honest, I fear for how it affects other moms, as well. I’m not here to throw her under the bus; I can’t judge her actions or intentions as she very well might have thought that her picture would provide just the momentum that moms need to get back to living healthy lives. Rather, my concern with her story is that women don’t need ANY MORE attention brought to how imperfect their bodies are. As a fitness person myself, I believe stories and images like this are missing the mark; the focus should be on HEALTH, rather than on our image or how we might appear to others.

 

I think a story like that of the “Hot Mom” can bring two concerning thoughts to the minds of moms who see it: incorrect ideas about health, and mom guilt … two things we DON’T need! I’m here to say that I don’t care if my body looks like that of a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader after this third baby is born; I CARE about being able to run around the backyard with my boys, having the strength and energy I need to take care of my family, feeling comfortable in my clothes, and doing everything I can to be healthy enough to meet my grand kids someday.

Unfortunately, I think Maria Kang’s picture is saying (however indirectly) that you have to be skinny and toned to be healthy. The reality is that you can have a very sexy, yet VERY unhealthy body. Let’s not forget that health comes in lots of different shapes and sizes! Your kids don’t need you to look like a super model; they need you to MODEL for them what a healthy, active lifestyle looks like. They need to see you making healthy choices and taking time to be active. You don’t have to be a gym freak or a Zumba lover to show your kids how to stay active; get outside and play with them, choose to walk as a family after dinner, or encourage your kids to help you rake leaves.

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Moms talk way too often about feeling guilty for way too many things: I haven’t cooked at home enough this week, I need to play with my kids more, I’m working too much, I’m working too little, I’m over-budget, etc, etc, etc. It’s exhausting being a mom, and it’s even worse when we walk around feeling crappy for everything we didn’t do “just right” (or at all, for that matter). In my opinion, Maria Kang’s post encourages mom guilt rather than helping us to fight it! As moms, we need to encourage one another – not guilt each other into feeling even more unworthy to handle the tasks we’ve been given as moms.

Remembering that being healthy is more important than looking hot is so hard to do in our culture. We can’t even buy underwear without fighting the temptation to believe we aren’t good enough just the way we are! I hope that as moms, we can create a movement toward encouraging others to be healthy without falling to the lies of our culture.

Jenn
"Jenn is a Special Education teacher turned health enthusiast. Most days she can be found chasing her three kids (4,2, and 8 months) around some park in Kansas City wearing workout clothes and sweaty hair. Jenn is an ACE Certified group fitness instructor and loves teaching group fitness classes around KC. She is also a NETA certified Wellness Coach. You can visit Jenn's wellness coaching website at http://www.jennmarasco.com .Jenn is crazy in love with her husband of seven years, Matthew. Their idea of a great date includes playing or attending some type of sporting event followed by a delicious meal from a local KC restaurant. Jenn and Matt lived in the Midtown neighborhood of KC for four years and recently moved to Overland Park."

3 COMMENTS

  1. This resonated completely with me! Thank you for sharing what I am also quite sure that other moms are feeling. We just want to do and be the best we can be for our kiddos!

  2. Jenn,
    I love this post! After 3 C-sections, it is hard not to feel discouraged about my inability to regain a flat tummy despite a healthy lifestyle and regular trips to the gym. A good friend recently told me that she looks at her love handles and thinks about how much she is loved. What a great perspective!

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