If you’ve been outside in the breeze or the psychotic midwest winds, you may have been unknowingly exposed to something. Perhaps, this time, it’s not your husband getting under your skin.
Have you recently had the sudden urge to strip the sheets from your bed in the middle of the night? You just can’t sleep because you cannot for the life of you stop itching. In the middle of the night stupor, you’ve convinced yourself that you’ve either lost your mind or you’ve got bed bugs or fleas or some other microscopic critter that has burrowed itself under your skin. A spider infestation? Showering at three in the morning seems like the best and most rational idea you’ve had since you began itching. Nonstop.
Have you woken up the following morning to find your upper torso covered with weird red hormonal pimple-like bites? In bizarre places like where a vampire might bite you? I am sure that you have wanted to pay attention to your poor children as they beg for relief from the strange bites that cover their adorable faces, necks and backs. They must have bed bugs too. Ahhhhh! You should have stripped their sheets first. A good mom would have done that, right? But, wait. In the back of your head, you hear the flight attendant come on the intercom saying, “In the case of an emergency, please secure your oxygen mask before your child’s.” That helps.
You start talking to friends, neighbors, the grocery bagger, and pretty much every other human being that you come in contact with. These bites are like the weather. You consult the internet. Social media. Web MD? Hallelujah. Mystery solved. You don’t have bed bugs. Or fleas. Or scabies.
Diagnosis: Oak Mite Bites. Refer to this article for enlarged creepy oak mite picture and other details.
You probably needed to wash your sheets anyways. And shower in the moonlight. The KCMB team has decided that showering immediately after playing outside helps. Hydrocortisone cream? Not so much. Liquid Benadryl before bed? Line up, kids. Maybe it helps, too.
The good news is, the oak mites will be gone soon. Welcome, winter. The bad news is, you may never look at a multi-colored pile of leaves the same way.
Rightfully so. Those oak mites stole hours of your sleep.
