When Mom Life Feels Lonely

When you’re a mom, especially to littles, you’re never really alone. Even bathroom breaks aren’t solo experiences, and if you think for a moment that it is, the silence is interrupted by a tiny hand pounding on the door. Despite this “never alone” kind of situation we find ourselves in, it’s still quite possible to feel lonely. 

Can I tell you something? 

It’s OK to feel lonely sometimes in this mom life! 

Never ending illness at your house? Totally can feel lonely (and crazy-inducing).

Sequestered for RSV Season (which can feel like all of eternity) because you had a preemie (or 3, in my case)? Terrible loneliness.

Feeling like you’ve lost all contact with friends, beyond double tapping their Instagram pictures? So lonely.

Thinking all your friends are out living it up while you’re sitting on your couch in your PJs? Yep – that’ll do it (but hot tip – they likely aren’t out every night, it just feels like it to you). 

Realizing you’re talking to your dog – OUT LOUD – fairly often? Yeah, that might make you realize you don’t get enough human interaction… boom. Feeling lonely.

You know what’s awesome though? That even though it feels like we’re alone in this loneliness, we’re not! Know how I know? Every time I’ve mentioned my struggle, it’s always met with “I thought I was the only one! What a relief to know I’m not!”. Always. And it’s not the same couple of friends having a case of the me-too’s, it’s always different people. 

Mama – it is OK to feel lonely sometimes, even though you clearly are not “alone” because your children are constantly clinging to you! 

So what do we do with this? 

We jump on social media to try to catch up with our friends. 

We start a silly text messaging string, filled with random quotes from Friends.

We read blogs.

We write our own blogs. 

We bundle our babies up and get out of the dang house! 

Know what I noticed about those favorite loneliness combating ideas? Most utilize technology. What the heck did moms do before technology?! Technology is the lifeline to most of my friends. I don’t know what I’d do without the ability to quickly crowd-source for ideas, help, and giggles, or reach out to dear friends I “met” online but know would help me if I was in crisis, or find other women who were writing about their struggles with the very same struggles I’m having. What a world we live in! 

Sure, this mom life can be lonely at times, but with a little clarity and focus we can find our way back out, thanks largely to these smart little devices that fit in our hands. Put yourself out there, and soon enough you’ll realize you’re not alone after all.

Helen Ransom
Helen and her husband are Kansas City transplants who thought they'd be heading back to New England but instead, fell in love with KC. She has identical triplet boys - Jackson, Ty, and Chase - who have somehow managed to survive life long enough to make it to third grade, and Lily who is now heading into kindergarten, and learned from a young age to duck when things fly through the room. Helen also has a newborn and baby photography studio in Waldo, Faces You Love Photography. You can read about current antics in Helen's home at her blog Three Times the Giggles.