The defensive tactical unit is starting to wear down. Now is our chance to go in for the attack. So far, we have been able to keep them down by invalidating their choices in birth and questioning their morals in parenting.
There are battles being fought all over the country in neighborhoods, parks and other places where mothers gather with their children. The war has been long and drawn out but we are determined to WIN THIS FIGHT!
How dare they breastfeed their babies in public and use only breast milk?
How can they even consider formula through a bottle?
Are they not thinking about the rest of us when they refuse to vaccinate?
Do they not realize how harmful those chemicals are in a new baby’s system?
Pick a side, one or the other. Then, grab your boots and helmets, throw on your armor, make sure your swords and bayonets are ready and check that you have plenty of ammo because you are going into battle! Ready or not! You wanna know why they declared war on you? You became a mother.
Does that sound ridiculous to you? Yeah, me too.
We are mothers, not soldiers going to war. But you wouldn’t know it from the daggers being thrown through comments back and forth to each other. None of us signed up for this, going into battle with each other – we got drafted when we decided to have a child.
Being a mom is one of the most challenging (and rewarding) “jobs” we ever commit to. Being responsible for the upbringing of another person carries a huge weight of responsibility in itself. We could never imagine that we would also have to justify and fight for every decision we make for our children and ourselves especially with OTHER WOMEN going through the same exact thing.
Mulling over the options, researching our choices, being conscious and mindful about the decisions we make as mothers and then to be challenged every.step.of.the.way, then throw in the added hormonal fluctuations of the postpartum period – IT IS TOO MUCH!
The isolation and loneliness that a woman feels when this kind of judgment is placed on her is among our worst fears as a person. The Mommy Wars are distracting us from what matters most, which is raising our children to have morals and values, and to be upstanding adults. Whatever method or technique or intuition we use shouldn’t really matter.
I call a cease-fire, here and NOW! Let’s stop tearing each other down; the damage we are doing to our children and ourselves is unrepairable. All I am saying is GIVE PEACE A CHANCE.
About the author: Heidi Shulista has been married to Bob for 18 years and together they have five tenacious and independent children ranging in age from 10-17 (yes, that’s five in seven years!) Heidi has experienced first-hand the uncertainties of becoming a mother, enjoying the rewards of being home with her children during their elementary school years, as well as being a full-time career mother.
She has always been very passionate about helping women, which is why her career as a doula makes so much sense for her. Heidi blogs for her company, Kansas City Doulas.
